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15 May 2007 @ 09:03 pm
leaving your life  
Preparing myself to leave Bulgaria is the strangest feeling. When I left the states, I always knew that I would return. In a very real sense, I didn't leave so much as took an extended absence from America. Now i've made a life in Bulgaria. I have friends, family, and work. The time has come to give it all up and return to my mother country. My stuff cannot be boxed up and stored at my mom's house. What is too expensive to ship must be given away, sold, or thrown away. The language that I speak daily will be forgotten after a short time. I am leaving the people, culture, food, and my life. When I come back, my students will have grown up and I will have missed all of it. I'm not ever going to live here again and I'm OK with that. It's what I want but it feels so strange to mentally prepare for something so permanent. The next time I come to Bulgaria I will be a tourist and not so much a local as I feel now.

I'm not complaining. Only mentioning that's what I'm feeling and it's not easy.
( 4 comments — Leave a comment )
jessielloyd on May 15th, 2007 06:17 pm (UTC)
word sista! i am feeling much the same way. for now, let bulgaria rock your house...80s style. love ya.
Vernon J: correctvernon_j on May 15th, 2007 11:14 pm (UTC)
Good Times!!
that is a chapter in your life you will never forgot, and is totally awesome. Life is wonderful!!
lizisnotworkinglizisnotworking on May 16th, 2007 03:48 am (UTC)
just keep thinking about mexican food and you won't dwell on the sad stuff. :)
Rachellabcreatedamber on May 17th, 2007 10:27 pm (UTC)
I think this is partly why I wanted to stay in MK. I wasn't ready to give all of that up just yet.

Sometimes it's too hard to accept change. I'm a natural procrastinator, so I put change off until I absolutely have to deal with it.

Good luck with packing. Make sure to triple-check that chair - don't want to leave anything there that you may need later.
( 4 comments — Leave a comment )